Patience is a virtue, but there are some virtues that I have a hard time practicing.
Lately, it seems like weekends drag on forever. She works on weekends, so I consciously try to keep myself occupied. When I lay my head down to sleep on Friday night, I am rife with anticipation of what the weekend will bring. I'm no slouch - and I tend to have lots to do on the weekends, which is good, because it saves me from sitting by the phone all weekend like an ugly girl on prom night.
However, by the time Sunday evening arrives, my patience is fully depleted, and I find myself asking stupid questions, and worse - making up stupid answers to those stupid questions.
At first, I would make up horrific stories to explain why she didn't call.
"In other news, a freak meteor shower disrupted telecommunications for most of British Columbia. Crews worked tirelessly to repair several miles of underground wires that were instantly vaporized when fragments of the comet crashed to the Earth in the remote wilderness ..."
After a while, I resigned myself to the fact that she doesn't call because she is busy. We all have jobs, so we know what it's like, right? You get home at the end of a long day (or night), and all you want to do is grab a bite to eat and then get some shut-eye. You wake up the next morning (or afternoon), and you barely have enough time to grab a shower and get ready for the next shift. It's normal. It's understandable. It's reasonable.
And yet, I find myself resenting her job. Impatient. Waaaaah! I want my Angel !!!
Ugh. Why do I do this to myself? Why should it matter when (or if) she calls?
Okay - I've got a new possible explanation. She must be a sadist. She knows how awful this is for me, and she relishes that fact. Yes, that's it. I bet she's giggling to herself all weekend long, thinking: "hah - squirm you little man - fall down to your knees and squirm in the mud like the spineless jellyfish that you are HAHAHAHAHA!!"
When (if) she calls tonight, I am going to be MISTER STRONG MAN. I shall not tell her that I missed her at all. I will show her that I am completely fine without her.
Script for next phone call:
Her: "Hello. How's everything?"
Me: "I'm sorry, who is calling again?"
Her: "It's me, silly - Angel."
Me: "Um - oh yeah - hi."
Her: "Did you have a good weekend?"
Me: "Yes, and the weekend isn't over yet."
Her: "Oh - did I catch you at a bad time?"
Me: "No - it's all right - give me a minute, though - okay?"
Her: "Ummm - okay - should I call back?"
Me: "No - wait, really. I just need to say goodbye to some people."
------ 5 minutes elapse - muffled voices of party-goers saying goodbye, etc. -----
Me: "Whew - sorry about that - house full of people" (catching breath)
Her: "Hmmm - really? What was going on?"
Me: "Oh nothing, did I tell you about my new neighbors?"
Her: "No, I ... "
Me: "I just call them the twins. They are soooo interesting!" (chuckle)
Me: "Well, I've certainly learned a thing or two about Scandanavia ..."
Her: "Well, I ... "
Me: "Oh yeah - and how was YOUR weekend, umm - Julie?"
Okay, I'm better now. - - I'll try to be patient.