Eve Triumphant

So much to be thankful for.

Eve has triumphed over evil. She faced her foe and shot him down.
Bonus - it sounds like she's going to have a job offer any day now.
Things are looking very good for her. Awesome, in fact.
I am so happy. She deserves every bit of it.

She is a very special woman. I am proud of her. I love her.
... Did I mention how beautiful she is?

Mission Statement

"Do all the good you can, By all the means you can, In all the ways you can, In all the places you can, At all the times you can, To all the people you can, As long as ever you can."

John Wesley

Triple to center

She's been having a tough week. (For the last several weeks, really.) I've been able to listen, to really "be there" for her. And I am proud of myself for learning the importance of validating and reaffirming her feelings.

She has remarked at how helpful it has been for her. She has thanked me several times; heartfelt thanks. I am glad that I was able to give that gift to her. (During a time when she really needed it.)

It makes me feel good about myself. Which gives me more energy. (That I can use to support her). Because she really does need support right now, whether she asks for it or not.

Peace within

No more hurt, no more tears, no more anger, no more sadness, no more blame.
I have completely let go of all of the crap that I started with my insecurity/jealousy.

I made the conscious decision to forgive all.
I ask for forgiveness in return.
(knowing that whether it comes or not, is out of my hands.)

I understand that things will never be the same as they were before.
But maybe that's not a bad thing. Maybe they can be even better.

In any case, I am thankful for what I/we already have, what is real right now.
What is real, is friendship and honesty, caring and support, acceptance and love.

I really appreciate the fact that we have maintained those things throughout.
And I believe that we will continue those things regardless.

I am prepared for whatever the future brings - I will accept any outcome.
I will support her and nourish her, without condition, regardless of myself.

I think the truest form of love is just wanting the other person to be happy.
I want you to be happy. <---- This means YOU.

Observations (life, pt. 3)

My dream became my hope
My hope became my love
My love became my refuge
My refuge became my shelter
My shelter became my safety
My safety became my concern
My concern became my fear
My fear became my doubt
My doubt became my suspicion
My suspicion became my jealousy
My jealousy became my weakness
My weakness became my shame
My shame became my distance
My distance became my absence
My absence became my panic
My panic became my undoing
My undoing became my loss
My loss became my grief
My grief became my survival
My survival became my purpose
My purpose became my clarity
My clarity became my understanding
My understanding became my compassion
My compassion became my forgiveness
My forgiveness became my release
My release became my tranquility
My tranquility became my comfort
My comfort became my strength
My strength became my courage
My courage became my hope
My hope awaits...

Unfinished

Had a great discussion with Eve earlier tonight.
She made a powerful observation about my life.
That I am surrounded by projects that were started, but never finished.
In fact, that seems to be a central theme to my life right now - unfinished work.

I've got a lot to ponder on this one. She's right.
But I'm so tired tonight. So tired.
I'll have to ponder in my dreams and finish this entry tomorrow.
Seriously.

Forgiveness

And now, a message to all of the people who so cheerfully intervened in our relationship:

Hello, my name is Doug. When I shook your hand, I was offering you my friendship.
I actually meant that, whether you meant it or not. (Just letting you know...) 

Maybe one day, you might find out a little more about the person that you were trying to tear down, or about the relationship that you were so eager to dismantle.

You might actually learn that I am not the monster you make me out to be. Yeah, turns out that I'm actually more like a decent, honorable man, (and for the most part, pretty damn selfless). In spite of your horror stories and fear-mongering, I have always done right by her, and I always will do right by her, because that's kinda how I am. In fact, I'm kinda that way with all people. It's just my nature.

On the other hand, you were quick to judge, and quick to condemn, and you don't seem to place a whole lot of value on other people's relationships. So, I guess that must be your nature.

I like to believe that the truth will always reveal itself, and I trust that she will be able to tell what's right from what's wrong; what's real from what's made-up. That being said, I've got nothing to hide, and nothing fear. I am a good man. I've done no wrong.

Best wishes, friends.
I forgive you for judging me.
I forgive you for slandering me.
I forgive you for everything.

That's just how I roll.
Now let's have some fun.