A leaf silently falls

I just got the news. Mike Pope passed away yesterday. It was peaceful - perhaps the first peace he's had in years.

He was one of the bravest, most selfless and giving men I have ever known. He suffered for years, and there was nothing any of us could do about it. But he never complained, and he never stopped. He just kept on giving of himself, even when he knew the end was near. He gave, when others stood by and watched. He gave, when nobody else would.

This is God's joke on humans - the good people suffer, and the scum of the Earth live lavishly. Where is justice? Where is the frakking justice?

Rest now, Mike. Your work here is complete. The rest of us will carry on with the work - we will follow your brave example. But I want you to know, brother in service ... that we're going to miss you.

So there it is.
Another friend gone.

It hurts.

Slander

A fellow can't keep people

from having a bad opinion of him,

but he can keep them

from being right about it.
-unknown-

Food Drive

It's Satuday, 5:45 am
And I'm leaving in fifteen minutes to work at a food bank.
Volunteering.
On my day off.

I'm not just an asshole.
I'm a good guy too, lots of times.
I like to think it balances out.
Darkness and light.

Hurtling through time.

They're Coming Back!

Australian Pink Floyd.
The whole Floyd experience, including flying pigs and laser shows.

I missed thier concert last time.
I'm not going to miss it this time!

I don't care if I have to sell my blood, I'm going, baby!
Woohoo!

http://click.eventful.com/tools/click/url?token=0MQAxLjAANTE3AGh0dHA6Ly9ldmVudGZ1bC5jb20vZXZlbnRzL0UwLTAwMS0wMTcyODEyOTItMQAzNTMwOTYwNzMAMA

Opportunity

So - I've been asked to serve on a board of directors (no pay, but lots of publicity). This will be a first for me, and definitely a step in the right direction. It's so interesting, fascinating, that things like this are just coming to me right now. My future is seeking me out, finding me, even though I've done little more than visualize, believe that the right things are happening, and move into it instead of shying away. Have I mentioned that I love this life?

"When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else."

Joseph Campbell

"I wish they would only take me as I am."

Vincent Van Gogh

Ugly

Tonight, I hit a bit of a low spot. I'm a little drunk, a little sad, a little hurt, and more than a little angry. I'm lonely and I'm alone. I feel ugly, inside and out.

You ever notice how the weaker dogs bark loud, and bark often? You ever notice how the stronger dogs wait to growl til they really mean it? Well, the following is a growl. It's my growl. It's a low, rumbling growl, but it's getting louder by the second.

It is especially directed to queen hornet and all of her little drones. I won't deny, it felt good to just say the words. But don't think that I don't mean it (because I do).

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Here's a handy recipe for making a friend into an enemy: {Some "friends" I met earlier this year passed this recipe along to me - try it, it really works!}

1. Judge me from a distance. Don't talk to me directly, talk about me behind my back.
2. Accuse me of having feelings or motives or issues that you actually have yourself.
3. Take some good things I've done and retell the story so it makes me sound bad.
4. Create gatherings. Invite other people that we both know but don't invite me.
5. Try to get others to join your "side". Form a movement against me.
6. Pretend to be a good person. Smile to my face. Be friendly in public.

Earlier this year, I held out my hand in friendship. I tried to make the best of a very difficult situation. I was meek and apologetic and striving hard to make peace. I was honest and genuine and open-hearted.

But instead of being my friend, you betrayed me. I tried to share, and you tried to steal. You lied about yourself to my face, and then you lied to others about me. You stabbed at my heart, and when that was no longer effective, you went after those closest to me.

In the past, I really tried to forgive. I am one of the most patient and peaceful people on the planet. I always try to hold my head high and avoid trouble. I walk away whenever I can. In this case, I walked away, multiple times. (I let you win, multiple times.)

Now, I regret to inform you, that you have successfully brought me down to your level. You have made me into your enemy. I didn't want it to be this way, but you insisted.

From this point forward, there is no more patience in me. I'm on a hair-trigger, and I'm very much tuned into your tactics. All you have to do is cross the line once - just once - and I will come at you with a vengeance like you've never seen before.

I am not attacking, but I am FIRMLY standing my ground.
It's your turn to walk away. (I suggest you do so.)

Stay away from me; stay out of my circles. Find someone else to focus on. Find another obsession. If you insist on provoking me, there will be hell to pay. Talk won't fix this any more. Go away, and don't come back.

Leave me and mine alone.
You have been warned.
The clock is ticking.

p.s. Number one way to ensure that I can't trust you: Lie to me. Repeatedly. (Assume that I'm just too dumb to know better.)